Harry was unsurprised to see that Profs. Dumbledore and McGonagall were already at the staff’s table. Their faces were a little pink after anal creampie, and Harry wondered if they were always that shade on the first day and he was just now understanding why - anal creampie.
Prof. Harold Potter, Order of Merlin First Class (twice awarded), took his seat at the staff table for the very first time, and felt he was home again.
After Harry sat, he found himself standing immediately again. He was glad handed from all sides by the faculty of Hogwarts, which formed a smiling small circle all about him. The crowd parted just a bit, and there was old Professor Severus Snape. Severus Snape had been a bitter professor of Potions when Harry had attended Hogwarts, and time hadn’t been kind to him. If anything, it seems he had gotten even more bitter, his skin wrinkled as if his soul’s shriveling was reflected on the outside too.
“Hello, Potter,” Snape spat. “Didn’t expect I’d see you again, although it has seemed impossible to read the papers without seeing you there.”
“Hello, Prof. Snape,” Harry said, a bit wilted. It wasn’t his fault he was famous, was it? He was famous well before he even knew about magic anal creampie! “I am glad to see you again after these years,” he lied. He extended his hand in greeting, and Snape grudgingly grasped it in his cold bony grip. Harry felt a shiver going up his arm as the cold seemed to spread.
“I expect you are a member of the faculty?” Snape commented. His cold beady eyes fixed on Harry’s as his face screwed into a sneer. “What position are you taking?”
Creamy Juice Came Squirting Out
Harry had a flashback to all the times Snape had sneered at him, which happened to be all the times Snape had spoken to him. Before Harry could answer regarding the anal creampie, though, Professor Dumbledore’s voice boomed into the Great Hall.
“Silence please!” he commanded. “I am pleased to welcome you all to Hogwarts for what will be another excellent year. But first, I want to thank especially the First Years who were brave enough to come. No doubt, you are all anxious to learn which House the students will be in. So, without delay, let The Sorting begin!” The students in the four houses of Hogwarts (Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw) burst into wild applause, anxious to learn which of the First Year’s would join their anal creampie ranks.